Proverbs 4:23

“Above all else, guard your heart”, Proverbs 4:23. Now, what do you suppose that means? How do would someone interpret it? Literally? Or figuratively? “Guard your heart”, putting up walls, protecting yourself, or placing protection over your heart, could be some possible explanations of it. Although, preparing yourself, mentally and emotionally for the things and events of life, that are to come, could make even another possibility. As human beings, we honestly can not foretell the future, or what is to come of it, therefore we don’t, well, more or less can’t, prepare ourselves for that exact event.

On the other hand, what we can do, is learn from what we have been through already in life. Preparing yourself based on past events makes you more aware, and I wouldn’t necessarily say paranoid, but close to it. Back to the verse, it says “Above ALL else”, so no matter what you do, make sure you’re prepared each day. Wake up, with a light heart, bright eyes, and a swift foot. Don’t let things bring you down. Yes, I know that its much easier said than done, I have been there too. Protect you heart from the things, places, people, events that you know will shatter it. Or if you’re the stronger breed, even so don’t flirt with disaster. You may have learned, healed, and grown from it, but you never know that possibly, deep down, inside there is still a small wound barely healing, but open enough to hurt just as much.

In the big picture, hurting and grieving are a part of the process of learning, and growing. Guarding and protecting are coincidentally, the second step. Now, that’s really where I stop with the ‘Step One, Step Two..’ type things, because not every one is the same, and if we all were emotionally, I think and feel that we’d be in for a horrible train wreck. Many people, have to go back, over and over again, feeling that pain more than once, maybe a few times, before they accept that its real, or even the notion that there is pain to be inflicted. We are known to be hard headed, and stubborn, and sometimes as hard as concrete when it comes to our hearts, and trying to protect it, all at the same time while avoiding getting hurt all over again. Its one big circle, chain of events, that is almost never ending. Yes, things can be good for the rest of your life, and when I say ‘pain’ I don’t mean, gut wrenching, tear jerking type pain. It can be anything. Something that makes you feel sad, hurts your feelings, disappoints you, or anything of that nature. So, pain isn’t necessarily huge and burdened, it could be something small, and insignificant to others, but to someone it could be everything.

No one hurts the same way. No one grieves the same way. No one protects the same way. No one heals the same way. Each and everyone of us, has to find our own way. Above all else, we will find our own way. While learning, hurting, and protecting, some of our paths may cross, and eventually join together to become one, and in that we rejoice.

“Above all else, guard your heart” is tattooed on the inside of my arm, and many will ask, as so many have done now, why that? Why that verse, and why is it significant for you? There is a never ending answer to “Why” but as for the other parts, just one. For me, guarding my heart is what I have done best, for my whole life, but in a way, that it could never feel again. Or so I thought. The walls around my heart, were more like suffocating it. Almost like, restricting and orchid plant from sunlight, it wilts, and eventually dies. There was a time in my life that my heart, well.. Was dead. I was dead- emotionally and passionately. This verse hits close to home for me, because I had to finally grieve over all the things that built up those walls around my heart, which after 20 years, is more like a dungeon without a key. For each brick, there was a painful memory. For each memory, I needed to grieve. For each grieving, I needed to heal. I, to this day, haven’t healed all my wounds, as some are much deeper than others, and will take time. This I have come to terms with. No matter what I have done it my life, this is the one thing I have perfected to suit my life. I still ’guard’ my heart, but not so, that its wilting away, but more so that it thrives on life, love, and happiness.

So, when interpreting this verse, think for yourself. Don’t take each word, for just that. Savor the thought, and trust your heart as it tells you, the story on its walls.

January 20, 2010